Outline
- Introduction
- How to Prepare for an Elderly Age
- #1: Be Sensitive Towards of the People of Elderly Age
- #2: Surround Yourself with People
- #3: Do A Lot of Charity
- #4: Ensure to Re-Marry
- #5: Make the Masjid Your Hotspot
- #6: Adopt the Habit of Reading
- Conclusion
Introduction
Alhamdulillah… Infinite praise and thanks are due to the Almighty Allah, who dedicates a special honour for the Muslim of an elderly age. Complete blessings and salutations go to the best man, who ever showed respect and care for people of the elderly age, Sayyidinā Muhammad, his household, his companions, and all those who follow his guided path.
No matter how passionate and dedicated you are about your job of 40 years or so, a day will come when you bid your employer and colleagues a good bye. That’s if you’re working for somebody. That’s what they call retirement. Expectedly, this will happen when you enter or are about to enter your elderly age. The thing is, unless you’re going to find alternative activities that will engage you as much or close to how your employment engages you, you’ll experience the worst boredom of man’s life.
This article suggests some activities that are believed to be helpful in preparation for a happy and fruitful elderly age. Please note, that the article is not necessarily intended for the respected elderly readers of GSalam.Net. Rather, it aims to be useful to the writer himself, as well as to any youth of his age or younger, to consider as they grow and may one day reach the age of bearing silver hair.
How to Prepare for an Elderly Age
Before moving on, please note that this article supplements my previous piece which presents the idea of retirement from both the conventional and Islamic viewpoints. To read it, click here. The following sections are some suggestions, that you should consider subscribing to, as they are helpful in preparing for a happy and fruitful elderly age. Insha Allah.
#1: Be Sensitive Towards of the People of Elderly Age
One of the ways we can prepare for a happy and fruitful elderly age, is to be sensitive towards the needs of any elderly we come across. They could be our parents, our in-laws, our teachers, our neighbours or even absolute strangers. Regardless of their religion, ethnicity or social class.
By doing that, you don’t only earn yourself rewards and protection from Allah, you also use it as a platform to teach your children how the elderly must be cared for. When they grow up to be adult, the only elderly they might have to deal with might be you.
Furthermore, elderly age has some advantages which can never be enjoyed unless you’re an elderly, that’s the privilege of special respect. In a ḥadīth reported by Imām Abū Dāwūd from the narration of Sayyidunā Abū Mūsā al-Ash‘arī raḍiya Allāhu ‘anhu, the Prophet Muhammad ṣallā Allāhu ‘alayhi wa sallam says:
إِنَّ مِنْ إِجْلالِ اللهِ تَعَالَى إِكْرَامُ ذِي الشَّيْبَةِ المُسْلِمِ، وَحَامِلِ القُرْآنِ غَيْر الغَالِي فِيهِ وَالجَافِي عَنْهُ، وَإِكْرَامُ ذِي السُّلْطَانِ المُقْسِطِ
It is out of reverence to Allah in respecting an aged Muslim, and the one who commits the Qur'an to memory and does not exaggerate pronouncing its letters nor forgets it after memorizing, and to respect the just ruler.
#2: Surround Yourself with People
If you interact with elderly people, you may realize that their main struggle goes around boredom and loneliness. At the same time, as much as people’s presence bring them happiness, the presence of children is what brings them the greatest happiness.
At an elderly age, the children who can be there to cool your eyes are likely to be your grandchildren. So, if you’re really considering attaining happiness and comfort in your elderly age (I don’t want to call it retirement age), then, make sure you make a lot of children as possible. This will increase your chances of having grandchildren.
Don’t limit Allah’s bounties of children upon you. Understandably, it could be difficult and challenging bringing up children, but it’s worth the challenge when elderly age kicks in, insha Allah.
We live in a time, when people deprive themselves with family planning. But it’s proven that when you plan to have only one child or two, you plan to deprive yourself from the coolness of eyes, which children will earn you in your elderly age.
In your elderly age, no matter how strong you are, you’ll need assistance. Sometimes, the assistance you need is permanent. It’s seldom, if you have only one child, that he will be able to be attend to you all the time. If he works, and has a family to care for, and worst still, if he stays far from you, then it’s going to be really depressing. Not only for you, but for him as well.
However, when you have numerous children, the tendency is they’ll take turns, in attending to you, sending you to the hospital, and hanging around you. And the most joyous part is, if they have children, they’ll fill your house and heart with joy!
It can be argued that, naturally, one parent can bring up a dozen of children when a dozen of children may find it difficult talking care of one elderly parent. If this is the sad truth, what more if you’ve planned to have only one child or two? Having many children entitles you for the probability of being taken care of, by at least one of them. If you, however, go for family planning, just make sure you’re not chopping off the one who will be keen and more concerned about your wellbeing.
#3: Do A Lot of Charity
This was emphasized in my previous article. However, I am repeating it here for its importance.
Doing and giving in charity is the best way to save for your ‘retirement’. No matter how much a retirement or life insurance or savings will help you, the assurance you receive from Allah in your elderly age, as a result of your savings in charity in your youth age is remarkably unimaginable.
Apart from the greater rewards that charity entitles you, and the happiness that it brings to your heart after seeing smiles in the face of whom you lend a favour or two, charity also protects you from calamities and tribulations.
This is to say, in your elderly age, if a calamity is to befall you, by the will of Allah, the charity you give today will intercede in your favour. For instance, if you’re to fall, it will protect you from falling, and if you fall, you won’t be injured, and if you’re injured, you will sustain minimal or no pains, by the will of Allah.
Here, it’s important to remind, that charity doesn’t only come in the form of giving out money in any form to the needy or lending physical help. Charity requires a mental state; that is carrying out some good deeds with the intention of seeking Allah’s ultimate pleasure.
Thus, charity is extending kindness in many dimensions. Giving out some of your money can be charity, whether it’s to a needy person, donation or fundraising drive. Likewise, sharing your knowledge to guide someone to make a good future is indeed a form of charity. Helping out in a community service (with the intention of charity) is certainly a form of charity. Uplifting the morale of someone who may be emotionally down is another dimension to attain charity.
#4: Ensure to Re-Marry
It’s heart-warming to come across a lovely and romantic elderly couple who got old together from young. However, it’s not usual that couples get old together and die together. The probability of one passing on before the other is high.
Unfortunately, there’re situations where the surviving partner tortures himself or herself twice. One for having to overcome the loss of a loved one, and two for allowing himself or herself to spend the rest of his or her life in a total emotional emptiness.
One of the things young people can observe in their elderly parents and relatives is sensitiveness, especially, if the elder parent is alone (without spouse). Sometimes we fail to realize that loneliness is one of the contributing factors to that. Imagine someone who’s used to going out of the house early in the morning and returns in the late afternoon or at night, for decades. And suddenly, he has to stay at home day and night. He may be able to cope with that, if there’s someone, i.e. spouse to entertain him or her. But what if, suddenly, that spouse passes on?
Meanwhile, if he has grown-up children, they must be busy working. The unemployed ones among them will spend most of their time outside the house, of course, with their friends. When at home, they’ll be busy with their personal things, if not their computers, phones and other gadgets.
In situations like this, the best person to understand you will be a soulmate. Your children and grandchildren, if any, will cool your eyes, but they won’t satisfy your emotional needs or emptiness, no matter what your circumstances are. In other words, as long as you eat and drink, you’ll continue to have sexual needs that must be fulfilled. If you can’t stop eating and drinking after losing your spouse, then don’t deprive your soul from its sexual needs.
Don’t be shy to seek to re-marry, if you become a widow or widower. Being shy to seek to fulfil your emotional emptiness lawfully may lead you to commit acts that will render you sinful in the eyes of Allah. Moreover, it’s certainly shameful to be seen committing indecency or immorality at an elderly age. This is in addition to the greater emptiness it will create in your heart. And if one can afford to fulfil his or her emotional needs the ḥarām way, what will be his or her excuse for not seeking to fulfil it the ḥalāl way?!
#5: Make the Masjid Your Hotspot
Frequenting the mosque for the five daily prayers and other acts of worship is one of the signs of īmān, as said by the Prophet Muhammad ṣallā Allāhu ‘alayhi wa sallam in an authentic ḥadīth, reported by Imām al-Tirmidhī from the narration of Sayyidunā Abū Sa‘īd al-Khudrī raḍiya Allahu ‘anhu:
إِذَا رَأَيْتُمُ الرَّجُلَ يَعْتَادُ الْمَسْجِدَ فَاشْهَدُوا لَهُ بِالإِيمَانِ. قَالَ اللَّهُ تَعَالَى: (إِنَّمَا يَعْمُرُ مَسَاجِدَ اللَّهِ مَنْ آمَنَ بِاللَّهِ وَالْيَوْمِ الآخِرِ).
“When you see a man frequenting the Masjid, then testify to his faith. Indeed Allah, Most High, said: The Masjid shall be maintained by those who believe in Allah and the Last day (Sūrah al-Tawbah, 9:18).”
In addition to that, the mosque serves as a community centre. It’s a place where you can offer your service or share your knowledge with people from all walks of life. By doing that, you build a network of righteous people, who we hope will be there to pray on your body, one fine day. Insha Allah.
Additionally, you develop more tranquillity, your stress is relieved, and you’re elevated spiritually. Moreover, you’re doing charity when you share your knowledge, skills, experience with those who need it.
#6: Adopt the Habit of Reading
These two habits will keep you active and happy in your elderly age. It will fill the time you spend alone in the absence of children and grandchildren, and in the events when you’re not engaged in any other activity.
Reading the Qur’an (even if you don’t understand it) will purify your soul, and grant you tranquillity beyond expectation. In addition to that, reading books, will keep your memory alive.
On the other hand, constant dhikr is the most effective mean to relief your stress. This goes without the need to emphasize the rewards you earn yourself as you in engage in constant remembrance of Allah.
The thing is, in order to really enjoy this in your elderly age, you should start practising them now. Make a point, from today onwards, to make some dhikr and read something from the Qur’an, and a page or two in a book. Any book will do, as long as it has some wisdom or value to offer you and keep you productive. Better still if they’re books that will keep you close to Allah.
Conclusion
This article suggested some activities which are helpful in preparing for a happy, fruitful and productive elderly age.
Here, I must record my intention to refer to it, as I grow, mature, experience life and get wiser. Why? So to improve it, add or correct any information stated. Although the suggestions I’ve outlined in this article are relevant for preparing for an elderly age, it might be more impactful if comes from an elderly person, which I’m obviously not. 🙂
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Allah knows best.
Allahu Hafiz 🙂
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